knit one

it's been a while.

not much new on the bipolar/meds/moods front, except that I'm beginning to be able to tell the difference between before and after the lithium. most notably, my mind doesn't race anymore! my mouth can actually keep up with it, which is exciting, but at the same time depressing. that is one of the things that made me so easily excited, and while I still am easily excited, I feel like I try and force it sometimes because I'm used to being far more energetic.

and now on to the stupid, typical boy dramarama.

there are two boys. we'll call them R and D. I used to date D 2 1/2 years ago. D still wants to be together, and I most definitely do not.

R, on the other hand, I think I would very much like to date, and he reciprocates, but we can't until I decide I want to have sex. because if we don't have sex he can't "make an emotional connection". if it were any other guy I'd say it was a cop-out, but R is 100% the most honest person I have ever met and there is no way we would have had the conversations about sex that we have if he (we) weren't. so I believe the things he says and really I think I like him all the more for it.