I realized something the other day.
I'm afraid. Terrified, really. Terrified that I'll never be used to my emotional turbulence, frightened that I won't always be able to control it, scared of the long-term effects of the medication I'm not even taking right now. Sometimes it seems like trying to view myself from every angle keeps me from seeing myself.
Plus, I'm angry with my need for control. It almost feels like a necessity. If I don't have control, if I'm not keeping a vigilant eye inward, what happens? Will I lose myself again? I'll tell you one thing - it does nothing for my anxiety.
No comments:
Post a Comment